jar of hearts

No, I can't take one more step towards you
‘Cause all that's waiting is regret
Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

[Chorus:]
Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I've learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

[Chorus]

It took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?





confusion for you...enough said. jake farlie i love you <3

go on snd scream. scream at me.

ever just felt like singing on the top of your voice in a pubic place? or along to a song at work? or in the supermarket in the car with friends.? then going to open your mouth and closing straght way? because of the fear of rejection? your not alone in rejection so next time open your mouth and sing for the rest of people who are to afaid to sing for themselfs. i can say i am finally happy but in my happness i can still feel sadness waiting for me. i feel like, i am two steps away from falling, but at the same time, i feel like i am walking on water. i guess thats life. latley i think that everybi=ody is expecting more from me, there expecting me to comform.. i will never comform, i believe i was set here for reason to help others be themselfs and have fun. i am thinkning that maybe i should look into a carearee in that somehow, it makes me happy to see others just being themselfs and not faking a smile.xxxx this song it how i am feeling atm, and yes i am singing it on the top of voice! <3I'm not a stranger
No I am yours
With crippled anger
And tears that still drip sore

A fragile flame aged
Is misery
And when our hearts meet
I know you see

I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I find it when
I am cut

I may seem crazy
Or painfully shy
And these scars wouldn't be so hidden
If you would just look me in the eye
I feel alone here and cold here
Though I don't want to die
But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside

I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I find it when
I am cut
Pain
I am not alone
I am not alone

I'm not a stranger
No I am yours
With crippled anger
And tears that still drip sore

But I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I found it when
I was cut

birthdayy

18 todayy :) the count down is over. my birthday is really just a anoter day.
i love some parts of my life right now and hate others i thinking this wont change though out my life. i love my family and friends/ boyfriendl, i miss some people. i love how everything is falling in and outta place at the moment i thinking that just being me complettly is working in my favor. i cant wait for saturday finally getting my tat :) i think everybody is going to expect me to make big life desions at the moment, but life is what happens when you busy making other plans, so i going to jjust roll with that and next year ill see wherre i am at! this year i want to travel all around see my newhue and erin , kylie :) i would love to get to new zealand for my nanny, i am so happy i got to spend time with her on my 18th :) all though i wish my nanny dunlop and grandad bill were i no there watching me from heavan or were ever they are <3 soo thatt my birthdayy spill xoxox

never understood

albury. i am not slut. i have self respect and i also respect other people and things. i am over this town. when has it ever been okay to just be a complete bitch to somene and everybody else just look away. thats not okay. by standers in my opion are just as worst as the person!! also when has it been okay to steal? or wreak things. like what is people problems. i am so over it! girls calling other girls sluts, c words and much worst google the word and i swear you wont say it anymore. most of the people saying these thing are skanky anyways, does my head in espeacially when girls go she a slut she texts like 5 guys, its like hey i can have male friends and not open my legs. jesus can i say hello to a male without being a slut. or can he say hello to me without cheating on you. people your doing my head in. also skanks why is it you can call me a slut when my clothes cover me, and your wear your undies in pubic you should i say shorts.... or when you kiss 1000 people night and i am with my bofriend.. really girls grow up. live in the real world and look outside of albury most of what your doing right now will affect you later. i just dont understand the girls here at all. all the groups here have issues that are so stuiped, i just want to hit them in the head with people who have real problems. they all talk behide each others back. what happen to a true friend. one that wouldnt sleep with your boyfriend or cheat on theres. so srewed up. albury really is a hole, because the people here make it that way by the way the act. so yea i am a real lady not a slut.

.... him

losing somebody is hard, when agianing someone is to easy. i go to sleep with him on my mind and wake up to stare at my phone waiting for his text.
its hard with him and harder without.. i dont no what to do anymore.. i dont want anyone else but he wont believe me. i am sick of feeling helpless. his cuddle fixs whatever went wrong in the day, how can anyone evr replace that. he makes me feel safe, he was mine. now he is whoever is lucky to have him how can i deal with that..what if he forgets about me.i am not anybodys, yet i feel like i am yours.

.. letters

.. looking at the keys to type i feel, what life is and how easy life should be but all i see is letters that cant explain the way i feel, the way i want life to be...
i guess i never had a chance to explain this..

BITCH

fridayy please hurry up :) gold cup with my girls. all of them even no they all fighting there coming with me :D yayy!><
so last night did see the hottest guy ever just saying. he probs should just take a photo and give it to so that i dont stare at him all the time...
me and jane thought that bffl ment best fuck fuck loser we soon found out it didnt :/ its kool our way :)
i also no that he wants me. but i dont want him :) and i loving it.. just saying its better to be a player then to be palyed :D haha bitch
ohh well aleast i can say fuck it now.
FRIDAY PLEASE BE NOW. THEN 18TH PLEASE HURRY UP... haha
oh also i know all the little dirty sercerts so dont try and hide shit from me.. just saying she was an ugly bitch you could have done better espeacily after me... HA
i love having my bitch back i have missed it.
also cry me a river bitch i dont miss you. so dont talk to me :)

my song i believe its about me :I’m a bitch
When I brush my teeth
I’m a bitch walking down the street

I’m a bitch
When I paint my lips
I’m a bi-tch
When people look at me

I’m a bitch
In disguise
I’m a bitch
That never minds

I’m a bitch
Just realize
I’m a bitch
All the time

I’m a bitch
i-t-c-h

I’m a bitch
When I walk my dog
I’m a bi-itch
When I fall in love

I’m a bitch
When I give a kiss
I’m a bi-itch
When I sing like this

I’m a bitch
In disguise
I’m a bitch
That never minds

I’m a bitch
Did you realize
I’m a bitch
Every time

I’m a bitch
i-t-c-h

b-i-t-c-h b-i-t-c-h in disguise
b-i-t-c-h


probs the happyest i have been sence forever ago :) <3<3

Backspace.

i wish i could backspace things out of my life. but thats just a wish. i no i can change things if i really want to, but i am not sure i do. these people that make me feel like crap are just making me stronger, although i wish they were gone, i no that they are there for a reason. its like for every good thing theres 2 bad at the moment, it starts to look up and then i am pushed right back down agian. one step forward, two step back, when all i want to do is run ahead and look back and no this shit was all worth it. i guess that day will come one day...... thinking i need a hug today.

i love my life

i love the sky when the clouds are about to pour.
i love the rain i love running in the rain. i love when my make up washs of and you see the real me. i love marlyin mason and scearming to music and runnin around the house in my undies. i love dancing. i love the way you used to look at me. i love being crazy and yelling i am bitch. i love my life even when i hate it.
i love the way i cry when i laugh. i love to play. and i hope to play until i die.
i love the feeling of walking on stage with all there eyes starin at me. i love going fast. i love to race. i love when you kiss me. i loved when you held me. i love that your gone even no i hate it. i love the letter g and the colour orange. i love any animals but i love liqards the most there legs are awesome... haha i love the feeling of rain on my face. i love you. i love to draw. i love wearing tshirt that are to big. i love pillows. i love coldrock. i love my car and broken phone.

i love my friends they are the best.
i love my family
i love my life compelty.
even if you dont like the way i live i do..xx

annoying things

it really annoys me how people dont reply. its like its not hard to type couple of letters in your phone and press send.....
it also annoys me when people stand in front of me. its like are you effing rude enough.... or when they talk with there mouth full its like ew i dont want to no what u are eatting....
facebook chat is the most annoying thing its like wanta work aye?
oh and nail poish why cant it dry in like a 30 sec i dont like waiting around forever!
or when you give someone a hint and they just dont get it.. that just agrh :/ ><
when you have song stuck in your head and you just want to sing it but you cant that just pisses me of. or when someone else does and they sing the most shit part of the song its like fml!
i dont mean to be a bitch but when people cry in pubic cause they fell over, something stuiped its like grow some balls?
when people touch me.. i hate it i can touch you but just dont touch me...
when your drunk and people try getting with you, its like i came to dance and have a good time eff off aye?
people who dont get that you dont care and they just keep talking.. thats the worst
people that are really quite, why live your life that.. i just dont understand
people who hate gay people i just want to kill them and i am not even gay...
girls that dont wear clothes in pubic like nice undies COME IN SHORTS?
FAT PEOPLE... they are a whole another topic they just piss me of. go to the gym


people annoy me... even when they no mean to.. its like fuck you to aye.... i think to many things get to me..

living lift now i am free of you.

i am only going to break your heart... so babe dont expect me not to.
i am here for a good time, not a long time. ill love you for awhile, but i am not easy to please. if after all this you still want me, maybe i still be there, but you never no, because i am always going to break your heart in some way because we both that i just wanted to dance and play xx

Let's have a toast for the douchebags
Let's have a toast for the assholes
Let's have a toast for the scumbags
Every one of them that I know
Let's have a toast for the jerk-offs
That'll never take work off
Baby, I got a plan
Runaway fast as you can <3<3 were gunna be pretty drunk!


dance with me. let your hair down. throw your body on mine. and undress me with your eyes. live little. and then walk away because we end with the song. <3

Just dance, it will all be okay in the end.

bestfriends

i seen my life, you were always by my side, holding me when cried and laugthing with me. you were the bones in back that helped me stand. but if this is so why do i feel so used.
i feel used by everyone. my bestfriend used me, he used me, they all use you.

wonderland.

my world crashed. but i am back on my feet, and i band aided the world so ill surrive. i wont cry, ill keep smilling because i am finalyy happy agian in my aloneness which in its imperfections is perfect for me :) yes ill miss you, but dont i miss everyone at one point in time. i am happy to talk to my bestfriend more i have missed the numbness that he brings into my life. so dont catch me when i fall, because i am strong enough to stand up without you and without a tear. now let me be in my crazy world. which is held by my band aid :) the one thing that i will miss is how safe i felt in your arms, although its funner to live on the edge is it not? 116 days. :)

i new i shouldnt have gotten out bed today.

i feel like if anyone says one thing wrong to me i am going to start crying. the wrong song on the radio and i am crying.
people are around me trying to help but i feel like there all just yellin or telling me what to do, i dont even have the engry to agure back. today has been fucked and its only 2. my world has crashed and i cant do anything but stare at the mess i all my life.

boreddd

i hate it when i press enter twice.. :/ yes that just happened haha
today was the best day ever!
apart from tafe
i love simmy and lexie
me and simmy are like little kids we played at the park all day and it was amazing! i love the swings and the phone thing. i think we had more fun then the little kids :)
freedom thats what i have felt all day :) and it has been great.
finally after like 2 weeks i feel good because of the great people i put around me :) my friends are awesome. <3

yeah i feel better

today has been shit! all i have done is think about you. ><
i hate you. my world is crashing down and i am going to fix it righ now.
yeah i am stronger than this. so kiss me and wish me luck on my way.
the best part of this is knowing its nothing compared to the pain i have felt and i had to remeber that pain to know that ill make it thought this. tonight may be valentines night but i dont need cuddles and cute shit. all i need is my pillow so i can sleep though this crappyyy day. tommowo really is another day, and it will be a good day, because i want it to be just like the night i meet you, i wanted to have a goodnight and it was. this saturday i will go out and i will be myself without having to worry what i look like and if you would care. i hope you read this so you know you were something to me, and i wont forget you cause you were my frist crush, but thats all you will ever be cause you didnt trust me or want me back. hope this makes you happy. cause i am happyer now i wrote it. oh and just so you should have really have replyed.

i wont cry cause your not worth my tears,

i hate how i have done nothing wrong yet people still hate me.
i asked my self today why do people start gummors and the only answer i could think of was cause they love watching people fall apart and and be sad.
i know now that your were always more then your you worth,
i think i enjoy being alone, with noone i can trust because once you trust someone you leave your heart open to be stabbed and i think if i got stabbed once more i would cry, but now i wont cry because you were never worth my tears if you believe the shit that comes out of peoples mouths.

looking for a reason

everyone is always looking for a reason to leave or yell at me. lately i fell like my world is falling apart. and all i can do is stand here and watch it.
i am happy in short moments. well they may be long moments but they feel like nothing compared to the time i spend worrying and being cranky.
i have also came to the conclusion that i want something/ someone when they dont want me and when they do i dont want them anymore. its like a an setting my self up to fail. today was fucked, expect i did enjoy seeing someone for the frist time in ages. let hope i feel better after i sleep.

my fears

fear i am scared of being happy, cause i cant take the hurt that comes after the smile leaves.
i am scared of not being enough, not good enough not pretty enough not smart enough not strong enough, just not enough for anyone.
i am scared of being me because ill fail you.
i am scared of you, because you strength over powers me and your light over powers mine.
i am scared to run because i know ill fall once more.
but i will not longer live in your shadow, because my greatist fear is to live a meanless life. without being enough for someone.

plumb - cut

I'm not a stranger
No I am yours
With crippled anger
And tears that still drip sore

A fragile flame aged
Is misery
And when our hearts meet
I know you see

I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I find it when
I am cut

I may seem crazy
Or painfully shy
And these scars wouldn't be so hidden
If you would just look me in the eye
I feel alone here and cold here
Though I don't want to die
But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside

I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I find it when
I am cut
Pain
I am not alone
I am not alone

I'm not a stranger
No I am yours
With crippled anger
And tears that still drip sore

But I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
Relief exists I found it when
I was cut

Water

water you need it to surrive.
water its the one thing that i need to surrive
water it heals
water heals me
water its can kill you
water it can kill me
water what is water its the thing that creates hope
water what us water is the thing that creats great fear.


water is like you to me.
its to confusing for me to explain

hit the road jack!!

:) loving life at the moment.. cant wait untill i at 18.. :)

everything has changed... yet agian.

everything is differnt. i am differnt, there still the same.
i am sick of the lies. when you stop caring about yourself. your left with nothing but i a fake smile.
it feels like your a dream. like i am a dream
i cant get you out of my head
i miss them. family is the back bone which makes us stand but at what point do i stand on my own?
who are we.
what are we.
so many qestions, yet i want nothing to change.
happy, or confusion.
my life, or what was my life, what is my life now.
differnt cause of you. cause there gone...

it feels oddly right in your arms..